Friday, February 1, 2013
Writing Task Week 1
Within The Anti Drug advertisement, the concept of growing up and graduating is being depicted as dangerous. The advertisement targets the teenagers parents and influences them to help their teen make the right decisions regarding alcohol and drugs in there final schooling year. Most obviously, the text practices the use of pictures to gain the attention of the parents. From studying the picture, it becomes clear that the text is focusing on female teenagers in particular, who is choosing which path they are going to take in life. To further hold the parents attention, the advertisement includes statistics from the beginning of the text. These statistics gives the writers credibility. Within the advertisement, it is assumed that all seniors are tempted with drugs and alcohol due to excitement of graduating, therefore depicting senior year as dangerous. It then provides parents with ways you can help the teen with their decision making. One of the points includes: “SET A GOOD EXAMPLE”. This is assuming that all teenagers need a role model when growing up, or they will make bad choices. Therefore, this advertisement depicts a negative view towards growing up and thoroughly enforces that teenagers need their parents to make the right decisions and too steer clear of temptations.
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Shaina, you are making an obvious attempt to utilise the correct paragraph structure for an analytical piece and, for the most part, you are successful. In particular, your topic sentence is very good because it directing addressed the question in a concise fashion while still allowing you to build upon the statement. However, throughout the rest of your paragraph, technical lapses can detract from the quality of your analysis. In a number of cases, the lapses appear quite careless. For example, mispelling 'there' and 'their' or not using apostrophes appropriately. You also need to think about how you phrase things. At one point you use second person, which is not only inappropriate in an analytical piece but also does not make sense in the context of your sentence. It is clear that you understand what you have to achieve in this type of task so try to work on the technical aspects of your writing to ensure that your work has polish as well as content.
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